Let's Go!!!!!!

(If any of you have done Insanity, you should read the title with Shaun T's voice in your head, haha.)

I'm tired.

I'm tired of hurting. I'm tired of being scared. I'm tired of not being able to run. I'm tired of not doing anything about it.

I'm ready to change all of that.

My first step was to set a goal to work towards. I am planning to run at Disneyland Paris next September. I don't know if it will be the 10K or the Half but I will decide that once I see how my training is working.

I need to do a lot of things to get there. I need to start eating better. I need to start walking and working out so I can eventually start running again. I need to strengthen my knee and ankle as well as everything around it so running will be possible.

I have the knowledge I need to eat better, I just have to do it. Part of that will be drinking Shakeology again but this time I will be adding collagen to it to try to help my joints.

Any of you that have been reading for a few years will know I did Insanity a few years ago and loved it. That is way too much for me right now but I am planning on getting Shaun T to help me again. His new program just went on sale and early access to it on Beachbody on Demand starts on January 14. I am planning on giving it a shot since there is a modifier for lower impact and each workout is only 20 minutes.

I also got the Believe run training journal to help me track my walks and runs as I try to become a runner again. Mac got me a Garmin 645 Music for Christmas.  I'm looking forward to using it because sometimes I hate using my phone for music since it is a pain to pull it out if I need to change anything and it drains the battery. I have always used Pandora but it doesn't work here so it is a good time to swap to something new. By using the built in storage on the watch, I can easily skip songs or change the music from the watch as well as see and use quick responses for texts without pulling out my phone. I also like that it has several smart watch features so I can wear it day to day.

I ordered a new weight  bench  to replace the one I sold before we moved. I am hoping to get an area set up so that I can start lifting again.

I've tried to use the things I have learned from my first journey to being a runner to help me hopefully do it again. I'm so tired of being in pain, but I know the reason I am hurting most times is because I have not being moving enough. I have known that for a while but changing it is hard when you are fighting depression and have no motivation to do ANYTHING, much less work out. I know working out will help with that too.

I have a long way to go but I am hopeful that I am on the right path to get there.

Checking In

Well it is starting to get cold here. Soon it will be time to start exploring the Christmas markets. I haven't been as active as I had hoped but I have been working on myself in other ways. Due to fear and anxiety, I have not been to the dentist in quite some time. However, during the month of  October, that changed. I have been several times to try to take care of things that have developed. I had to have a root canal because an old filling failed and that has taken lots of time. I also just had my wisdom teeth removed. I'm slowly healing and things have gone pretty well but I am glad it is something that will not ever happen again. Once I finish healing, I will do the last step of the root canal(permanent crown placement) and have a few cavities taken care of to finish up.

A happy side effect of all of the dental work has been the fact that I have been more aware of what I am eating and as a result, I have lost some weight. I started losing a little when first moved here but it has become more consistent since September. Hopefully I can keep it up because I know losing weight will help with the joint issues I have been dealing with since I hurt my ankle.

I need to start getting more active again but slowly. We took a trip to Italy and while it was amazing, I was in a lot of pain once we got home. I completely over did it. I need to start easing back into things. We have another trip coming up but it won't be quite as physically demanding as the Italy trip.

It's hard to believe we have been here for 8 months. We still aren't completely settled but I am hoping to get the downstairs complete or at least closer to it in the next month. I want to be able to decorate for Christmas and possibly have a holiday get together with people in the neighborhood.

I guess that is all for now. Sorry I haven't been checking in as much as I had hoped. Maybe once I start working out more regularly and have a better plan I will get back into the habit of blogging.

Finding myself again

I feel like I haven't been wholly me in a very long time. I have lost touch with one of the things I love the most. I have not been creating and building in the way I used to and I really miss that artistic part of me. Though I have dabbled with things that tapped into that part of me a little, I have not created art just for the sake of being art in a very long time. Most pictures I have taken have been for others, and while that is something I enjoy, it is not the same as taking them for myself.

Beyond photography, it has been many years since I have painted or sketched anything. I was able to buy a nice, large easel from a yard sale group here not long after we moved in. I also picked up a bunch of paints from someone that was moving back to the states. I haven't done anything with any of it yet but I am hoping once I get the house set up and organized, I can start creating again.

The first weekend in August, Mac and I did a quick day trip up the Amsterdam. I really wanted to go to the Van Gogh museum. He is one of several artists that helped me find my love of art and I want to see as many of their creations in person as I can while we are in Europe. Being there and seeing the things he created and even an artists pallet that he used brought tears to my eyes. It made me want to start finding my artistic voice. I want to start painting and finding what is "me." I want to start sketching again to help rebuild those skills.

I'm still not having the best success with my knee and ankle. I never started water aerobics and I really need to do that soon. I still have a long way to go before I can get back to the active part of me so I am trying to work on some of the other parts for now. Hopefully I can find that little piece of an artist that I think is still hiding in there somewhere.

Guten Tag

We have been in Germany for just over three months. It doesn't feel like it has been that long and also feels like longer. Unfortunately, Mac has been gone a lot for work so we haven't been able to travel much together(he has seen several new places on his own). It's been hard to get completely settled because dealing with a painful knee and aggravated ankle means that I can't stand very long so unpacking and cleaning has been hard to do. And since Mac has been working so much, he has not been able to help out with it either. Soon, he will be taking some leave and while our main goal is to finally get the house set up, we are also going to try to do a few day trips to see a few places and start exploring.

I finally started physical therapy a couple weeks ago. I have several exercises to help strengthen my leg. It is just going to be a long process to get back to where I was. I am also going to be trying to get back to eating better. Hopefully once the house is finally set up correctly, I will be able to get into a better routine and start moving forward.

I'm going to try to check in here more often.

Until next time...

Big changes

Sorry I have not posted in a long time. The last time I did post, I talked a little about upcoming moves. Well, things changed and though Mac did head to Virginia after his deployment, I did not get to go with him. There were lots of complicating factors so I stayed in SC and visited him as often as I could. He finished up there just before Christmas and we started packing up for our over seas move. Of course, that also did not go as planned. Mac received a slot in a month long training right before we were supposed to move. We went ahead and packed up and shipped our things in Dec so that it was done and on the way and I could join him in New Mexico. When the training wrapped up we would go see family and then get on a plane headed for a new adventure. Unfortunately, the training course was set to start the Monday after the government shutdown and the training was cancelled at the last minute. So in the middle of January, we found ourselves with no where to live(we ended the lease on our house), no stuff(it was on a boat), not enough leave to last until our flights(Mac was supposed to be in training for a month, not on leave) and no idea what to do. We ended up heading back to SC and living in the base hotel while Mac went back to work for a little over a month. Finally, in March, the time came for us to head out on our new adventure in Germany.

There will be lots to see and do during the time we live here. I want to take in as much as I can but that means I definitely have to start working on getting back into shape. To see and do the things we want to do, it will require lots of walking.  I want to be able to run again and feel good about myself again. It's been a hard road since my injuries and I am ready to feel like myself again. I'm hoping to start going to water aerobics twice a week and start a strength and running program to slowly rebuild my fitness.

I really hope to start posting here again. I will probably be posting about fitness and life over here. We have been here for 3 weeks and in our new home here for one week. It's still going to take some time for us to settle in and get unpacked but once that happens, I want to start focusing on getting healthy again.