I'm really liking the new running plan that I am using. It is sort of a hybrid of a few different plans and it isn't something that would have worked for me when I was starting out or even last year but it is perfect for where I am now. One of the huge things that I have learned especially over the last year is that you have to adapt everything to yourself. There is no cookie cutter plan that is perfect for everyone. We are all different and finding what works best for you is part of the learning process.
You all know I love Galloway and the run/walk method. That has not changed, but with all of the races I have coming up, his plans didn't really fit because I have so many races so close together. That's why I started looking at other things. I saw that RunKeeper has training plans that you can use too so I looked into them. I found the beginner half marathon plan and really liked it. It is NOT FOR THE TRUE BEGINNER because there is a LOT of running and the mileage goes up quickly, but for someone that has been running 5Ks for a while and can easily get in a three mile run without feeling too tired, it is a good plan to help build mileage. With the RunKeeper schedule, you start out running 3 miles, three days a week and then a longer run on the weekend. the first week it is 3, 3, 3 and 4. Then it goes up to 3, 3, 3 and 5. After a while, you change up to 3, 4, 3 and a long run then eventually three 4 mile runs a week plus your long weekend run. One of the things I like about this plan is that it has me running back to back every week. The last shorter run each week and your weekend long runs are on back to back days. Since I am planning to not only do the Glass Slipper Challenge in February(10K Saturday, half on Sunday) I am planning to do the unofficial Pixie Challenge at Tink(10K Saturday, half on Sunday), I figured having back to back runs in my training early on would only help me out with these tasks later. The first week I was a little worried about the back to back runs but I felt good after. I didn't push too hard and I got them both done with decent average paces.
I am also incorporating the Weight Watchers 5K plan that I have used a few times now. I'm using the interval progressions in it to help me build back up to running for 30 minutes(or longer) straight. Even though I plan to continue to use intervals for races and long runs, I want to be able to run 30 minutes so that those intervals feel easier and I can sustain them for longer. With every double digit run I have done up until now, I have always had to mostly walk after mile 9. I want to be able to keep doing my intervals all the way until the end. I am hoping that building up the the 30 minutes and building my overall endurance will help me to sustain a good 1:1 interval for longer. I started adding in the WW interval progressions to my shorter weekday runs two weeks ago. I did the RunKeeper plan by itself with my normal 1:1 intervals for about a month to help build a good base. This week, my longest intervals were 5:3. They were tough but I made it through .
Right now, Saturdays
are my long runs. Since it is hot and I am running at night, we do the back to back runs on Friday and Saturday night so Mac can run with me. Once it starts cooling down(after ToT), we will shift it to Saturday/Sunday runs during the day. Last night, Mac and I got 6 miles in at my normal 1:1 intervals.
The intervals felt so short after a week of longer intervals. I felt really good
for the entire run except for getting hungry at the end because I didn't
eat enough during the day. For the past month I have been doing 5 miles every
Saturday but tonight started the steady climb until Tower of Terror Ten
Miler. We did 6 tonight and will increase by one mile every week until I
drop back for a taper the weekend before the race.I shifted some things around in the RunKeeper plan to fit my race schedule but I am confident that it is going to work out well. I feel like I will be able to have a good strong race if everything continues the way it has been going.
Things are starting
to get real but I am feeling really good. This is the first time I have been really excited about where it is all going instead of just forcing myself through it all just to be able to finish. I'm still not fast and I don't expect a stellar finish time at any of these races but I am hoping for good times for me. In the three half marathons I have completed, I have yet to actually finish with a time under the required pace. I am actually confident that at the Tower of Terror Ten Miler, I will finally be able to say I ran "fast enough." I'm really hopeful and that feels really good.
Sunday, August 25, 2013
Monday, August 19, 2013
Good Week
I wasn't really sure what this past week was going to be like but it turned out to be a really good week. I was supposed to run 3 miles on Monday night but for whatever reason, that didn't happen. Tuesday, I decided to go out for a short one mile run. I hadn't ran a fast mile in a few weeks so I wanted to see where I was. The last time I did a mile as fast as I could, my finish time was 11:06 on July 22. I was so close to being under 11 minutes so I wanted to try it again. I went out, pushed myself and finished the mile in 10:51. I think I probably could have gone a little faster but it was still so hot that night. It is usually around 80-85 degrees when I run but Tuesday it was still 90 because I ran a little earlier.(9:30 instead of 11:30-midnight)
Wednesday it rained most of the day. That night I decided to go out for my scheduled 3 miles excited that it was only 78 degrees. I got outside and started my warm up. I knew the air felt really thick because of the rain earlier in the day. After my first lap doing intervals, I was SOAKING wet. I checked the weather on my phone and saw that even though the temps were lower, the humidity was at 94%. I was dying. As I finished my second lap and approached the one mile mark, I SERIOUSLY considered just going home. But for some reason, I kept going. It was miserable and the humidity was getting WORSE. It was probably about 99% when I finished my 3 miles. I was glad I got it done and I had a decent pace even though I felt like I was swimming instead of running.Of course, 100 feet from my house, it started raining. If it had started when I started running, it would have been a great run but since it held off, I was fighting climbing humidity the entire time.
I am trying to build back up to being able to run a full 30 minutes again since I did not maintain it after I hit that mark in May.(Mostly due to starting Insanity) I am using the same interval progression that I used last time from the WW 5K program but instead of limiting it to the repetitions on the plan, I am doing them for the duration of my 3 mile runs. I'm going to do this until the intervals get really long later in the plan and then I will just do them for the first 30 or so minutes of the run and then switch back to shorter intervals for the rest. The first few days of the plan call for 1/1 intervals which is my normal and that's what I did for Wednesday. On Thursday, I was set to go up to a 2 minute run, 3 minute walk. I knew this was going to slow down my average pace but I want to build back up so I did it. My fastest mile was run with 1/1 intervals. If I run a mile straight, I am still over 12 minutes and will be for a while I am sure but I also know that if I can start running at least 30 minutes straight for the first part of my weekday runs, my intervals on the long weekend runs will be much stronger because I will have much more endurance. That is why I am building back up.
Thursday night was very similar to Wednesday since it rained all day again but fortunately, it wasn't quite as humid, only about 85%. I started out by doing one lap in the neighborhood and then decided to venture out to our longer route on the closed road so that I couldn't quit early. As I started out of the neighborhood, I changed my mind. My stomach wasn't feeling 100% and I didn't want to get stuck without an option for a place to stop. Instead of turning right to head to the gate road, I turned left and went to the PT track that is near our neighborhood. It is a 0.4 mile loop around a few rows of buildings that are used as soldier barracks for international troops. Currently, they are empty so it is a nice and quiet, well lit area to run. Plus since I wasn't running past my house every lap it made quitting early a little harder but I was still close enough that if I needed to, I could get home quickly. I decided to do a mile and a half around the track before heading back into the neighborhood to finish up the last mile. After finishing my four laps there I did two more in the neighborhood. When I came inside after, I looked like I had been playing in a sprinkler. I was SOAKING wet again and the sweat was pouring down my face. My pace was much slower than usual due to the different intervals but I got the 3 miles done and I was happy.
My normal weekly schedule is 3 miles on Monday, Wednesday and Friday with a longer run on Saturday. I changed things up to Monday, Wednesday and Thursday because of two reasons. We had friends coming into town on Friday and I had decided to run the Hotter than Hades 5K again this year. I knew that it would be best for me to rest Friday night if I wanted to have a good race Saturday morning. I was praying for good weather.
I ran this race the first time in 2011. It was hot, humid and I finished at around 55 minutes. In 2012, I decided to run it again and it was hot humid and I finished in 44:28 and it was my first sub 45 5K. This year, the weather was PERFECT. It was only around 70 degrees when the race started and it was a normal morning humidity for TX of around 65%. I felt really good and ready to do it. Mac was actually able to run with me this year which was nice. We started out good even though I had a little hiccup with forgetting to change the intervals in the Garmin so it didn't start tracking us until right after we started since I had to change them. Fortunately, Mac paid attention to the clock time as we went by so I could have an accurate time. I was REALLY hoping for a sub 40 time. I came so close at the July 4th 5K but just missed it(40:25). I knew that if I kept to my intervals and didn't start too fast, I had a good shot. It was crazy how quickly this race seemed to pass. I remember being surprised when we were already done with two miles and I still felt really strong. Doing 5 miles every Saturday for the past 3 weeks has really paid off. The only problem I had that morning was dealing with sweat getting in my eyes and then my ear buds falling when I would take my sunglasses off to wipe it away. I never stopped but it did slow me down a little. Finally when we were headed away from the sun, I just took the sunglasses off and handed them to Mac. Before I knew it, we were down to only two turns and you could see the finish line. I was starting to feel a little tired. I changed up my interval a little so that I could wait and run the last stretch of the course. After making the final turn, I started running again. I got a little aggravated because there was a guy that kept getting in the way and made it hard for me to get by and finish. I knew I needed to finish with a clock time of 40:20 or less for me to hit my goal. Then I noticed that they clock was at around 39:30 and I didn't have far to go. I became determined to finish before the clock hit 40. I finally started speeding up and forced my way past the guy. Mac yelled, "Go, baby!" To which I replied, "I'm going." I sprinted to the finish line and out of the corner of my eye saw 39:59 on the clock. I did it! I finally finished a 5K in less than 40 minutes. My actual time was 39:37. I was so happy. That race has come to mean a lot to me over the last few years. I was glad to pick up a t-shirt this year since they started selling them at the 5Ks instead of raffling them off last year. The 5K is free so paying a little for the shirt doesn't bother me at all. The shirts this year were really cool so Mac and I grabbed one before the race. When we were done and I saw the shirts in the car, I commented that now I have a shirt from my first sub 40 5K.
After the 5K we headed to brunch at a local all natural, very tasty cafe. The food was so good and the protein from the bacon and eggs really hit the spot. We did a little shopping and then hit a farewell bbq for Mac's 1st SGT. I stayed away from all of the crazy sweets they had and focused on the tasty bbq chicken and the awesome pineapple they had. At the end of the day, I still felt really good and the temperature was amazing after the sun went down. I told Mac that I really felt like going for another run and since the schedule had 5 miles on it, that we should at least do two miles. He agreed and we headed out. He road his bike because his legs was bothering him a little and the last thing we need is for his stress fracture to return. I decided I wanted to do 3 miles which we did. When we finished up, I was tired but I still felt good. I basically did a 10K over the course of the day yesterday. My average paces for both runs were pretty good and I felt strong.
I am finally really starting to feel like a runner. I've said that I am a runner for the last two years because I am but I am finally starting to feel it. Most nights, I would dread my runs until I got started. Once I got going I was good but I was always pretty tired when I was done. Now when I am doing these shorter weekday runs, I usually feel pretty good at the end. Even the 5 miles we did last weekend seemed to go by really smoothly. I am finally building a good solid base and I'm at the point where my body can handle it much better. I am becoming very hopeful about the Tower of Terror Ten Miler in 7 weeks. I will finish the 6 week plan to getting to a 30 minute run so I should be nice a strong for my short intervals and I have a good plan for the long runs to help me build up and push back that wall. I'm finally really excited about where my running is going instead of just pushing through and hoping that I will eventually get better at it.
Wednesday it rained most of the day. That night I decided to go out for my scheduled 3 miles excited that it was only 78 degrees. I got outside and started my warm up. I knew the air felt really thick because of the rain earlier in the day. After my first lap doing intervals, I was SOAKING wet. I checked the weather on my phone and saw that even though the temps were lower, the humidity was at 94%. I was dying. As I finished my second lap and approached the one mile mark, I SERIOUSLY considered just going home. But for some reason, I kept going. It was miserable and the humidity was getting WORSE. It was probably about 99% when I finished my 3 miles. I was glad I got it done and I had a decent pace even though I felt like I was swimming instead of running.Of course, 100 feet from my house, it started raining. If it had started when I started running, it would have been a great run but since it held off, I was fighting climbing humidity the entire time.
I am trying to build back up to being able to run a full 30 minutes again since I did not maintain it after I hit that mark in May.(Mostly due to starting Insanity) I am using the same interval progression that I used last time from the WW 5K program but instead of limiting it to the repetitions on the plan, I am doing them for the duration of my 3 mile runs. I'm going to do this until the intervals get really long later in the plan and then I will just do them for the first 30 or so minutes of the run and then switch back to shorter intervals for the rest. The first few days of the plan call for 1/1 intervals which is my normal and that's what I did for Wednesday. On Thursday, I was set to go up to a 2 minute run, 3 minute walk. I knew this was going to slow down my average pace but I want to build back up so I did it. My fastest mile was run with 1/1 intervals. If I run a mile straight, I am still over 12 minutes and will be for a while I am sure but I also know that if I can start running at least 30 minutes straight for the first part of my weekday runs, my intervals on the long weekend runs will be much stronger because I will have much more endurance. That is why I am building back up.
Thursday night was very similar to Wednesday since it rained all day again but fortunately, it wasn't quite as humid, only about 85%. I started out by doing one lap in the neighborhood and then decided to venture out to our longer route on the closed road so that I couldn't quit early. As I started out of the neighborhood, I changed my mind. My stomach wasn't feeling 100% and I didn't want to get stuck without an option for a place to stop. Instead of turning right to head to the gate road, I turned left and went to the PT track that is near our neighborhood. It is a 0.4 mile loop around a few rows of buildings that are used as soldier barracks for international troops. Currently, they are empty so it is a nice and quiet, well lit area to run. Plus since I wasn't running past my house every lap it made quitting early a little harder but I was still close enough that if I needed to, I could get home quickly. I decided to do a mile and a half around the track before heading back into the neighborhood to finish up the last mile. After finishing my four laps there I did two more in the neighborhood. When I came inside after, I looked like I had been playing in a sprinkler. I was SOAKING wet again and the sweat was pouring down my face. My pace was much slower than usual due to the different intervals but I got the 3 miles done and I was happy.
My normal weekly schedule is 3 miles on Monday, Wednesday and Friday with a longer run on Saturday. I changed things up to Monday, Wednesday and Thursday because of two reasons. We had friends coming into town on Friday and I had decided to run the Hotter than Hades 5K again this year. I knew that it would be best for me to rest Friday night if I wanted to have a good race Saturday morning. I was praying for good weather.
I ran this race the first time in 2011. It was hot, humid and I finished at around 55 minutes. In 2012, I decided to run it again and it was hot humid and I finished in 44:28 and it was my first sub 45 5K. This year, the weather was PERFECT. It was only around 70 degrees when the race started and it was a normal morning humidity for TX of around 65%. I felt really good and ready to do it. Mac was actually able to run with me this year which was nice. We started out good even though I had a little hiccup with forgetting to change the intervals in the Garmin so it didn't start tracking us until right after we started since I had to change them. Fortunately, Mac paid attention to the clock time as we went by so I could have an accurate time. I was REALLY hoping for a sub 40 time. I came so close at the July 4th 5K but just missed it(40:25). I knew that if I kept to my intervals and didn't start too fast, I had a good shot. It was crazy how quickly this race seemed to pass. I remember being surprised when we were already done with two miles and I still felt really strong. Doing 5 miles every Saturday for the past 3 weeks has really paid off. The only problem I had that morning was dealing with sweat getting in my eyes and then my ear buds falling when I would take my sunglasses off to wipe it away. I never stopped but it did slow me down a little. Finally when we were headed away from the sun, I just took the sunglasses off and handed them to Mac. Before I knew it, we were down to only two turns and you could see the finish line. I was starting to feel a little tired. I changed up my interval a little so that I could wait and run the last stretch of the course. After making the final turn, I started running again. I got a little aggravated because there was a guy that kept getting in the way and made it hard for me to get by and finish. I knew I needed to finish with a clock time of 40:20 or less for me to hit my goal. Then I noticed that they clock was at around 39:30 and I didn't have far to go. I became determined to finish before the clock hit 40. I finally started speeding up and forced my way past the guy. Mac yelled, "Go, baby!" To which I replied, "I'm going." I sprinted to the finish line and out of the corner of my eye saw 39:59 on the clock. I did it! I finally finished a 5K in less than 40 minutes. My actual time was 39:37. I was so happy. That race has come to mean a lot to me over the last few years. I was glad to pick up a t-shirt this year since they started selling them at the 5Ks instead of raffling them off last year. The 5K is free so paying a little for the shirt doesn't bother me at all. The shirts this year were really cool so Mac and I grabbed one before the race. When we were done and I saw the shirts in the car, I commented that now I have a shirt from my first sub 40 5K.
After the 5K we headed to brunch at a local all natural, very tasty cafe. The food was so good and the protein from the bacon and eggs really hit the spot. We did a little shopping and then hit a farewell bbq for Mac's 1st SGT. I stayed away from all of the crazy sweets they had and focused on the tasty bbq chicken and the awesome pineapple they had. At the end of the day, I still felt really good and the temperature was amazing after the sun went down. I told Mac that I really felt like going for another run and since the schedule had 5 miles on it, that we should at least do two miles. He agreed and we headed out. He road his bike because his legs was bothering him a little and the last thing we need is for his stress fracture to return. I decided I wanted to do 3 miles which we did. When we finished up, I was tired but I still felt good. I basically did a 10K over the course of the day yesterday. My average paces for both runs were pretty good and I felt strong.
I am finally really starting to feel like a runner. I've said that I am a runner for the last two years because I am but I am finally starting to feel it. Most nights, I would dread my runs until I got started. Once I got going I was good but I was always pretty tired when I was done. Now when I am doing these shorter weekday runs, I usually feel pretty good at the end. Even the 5 miles we did last weekend seemed to go by really smoothly. I am finally building a good solid base and I'm at the point where my body can handle it much better. I am becoming very hopeful about the Tower of Terror Ten Miler in 7 weeks. I will finish the 6 week plan to getting to a 30 minute run so I should be nice a strong for my short intervals and I have a good plan for the long runs to help me build up and push back that wall. I'm finally really excited about where my running is going instead of just pushing through and hoping that I will eventually get better at it.
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
The Emotional Journey
Sometimes I don't think people realize how much of an emotional journey getting healthier and becoming a runner really is. There is so much more to it than just eating right and lacing up your shoes and hitting the pavement. Many times people have emotional demons they have to fight to be able to really make the changes they want. Some people are emotional eaters, and until they can get that under control, there is no hope in sticking to a diet. Some people care too much about what others think and until they can overcome that, they cannot take the steps necessary to get in shape.
For me, the later was my demon. Even though many may think that caring about what others think would drive you to get healthy, many times it is the complete opposite. When you worry so much about the opinions of others, you find yourself hiding out at home on the couch with a bag of chips, not hitting the gym and working out.
The first time I seriously tried to get control of my weight, Mac and I were living in El Paso. He had just commissioned into the Army and we were there for one of his training schools that lasted 5 months. We had been married for just over a year and we were living in a hotel on Fort Bliss. As part of living in the hotel, we had a pass to the indoor pool that just so happened to be across the street from the building we lived in. I decided that I was going to do weight watchers online and start going to the pool every day. Growing up, my grand parents had a pool I spent every hour I could in it. I have always loved swimming so I thought that would be the perfect thing to help me get back into shape.The first day that I walked over to the pool, I had no idea what I was in for. I walked in and there were soldiers in there working out. For some reason, it never dawned on me that there may be soldiers in there in the middle of the day. I changed into my suit and hopped in to the pool. I started swimming laps and after a few minutes, I had to get out. I started having a full blown panic attack. I was crying and hyperventilating which is a really bad thing to do in a pool. I got out of the pool, ran to the locker room, grabbed my stuff and left. I cried all the way back to our room. The reality is, no one said anything to me. No one gave me dirty looks. Nothing that anyone in the pool did triggered this reaction. I was so focused on what they MIGHT think and what I thought of myself that I was literally crippled by fear and shame. I never went back to the pool while we lived there. My efforts to get in shape and lose weight failed soon after and I gained more weight.
I have been living on an Army post for the last 5 1/2 years. There are numerous free gyms and free pools. I can probably count on two hands the number of times I have used a gym here. It's very intimidating to be in a gym with a bunch very fit soldiers. Especially when you have NO IDEA what you are doing. I have never been a gym person. I played sports. Just going to a gym and working out didn't make sense to me. I needed something to work towards and that is one of the reasons I got into running. But I didn't get into that until we had lived here for nearly 3 years. I tried in 2010, but I let my doubts get the best of me. That's what led to the 8 miles I did at Princess 2011. After being swept, I knew that I could do it if I tried. That confidence boost allowed me to settle into running and start down a path to a better life.
Running was easier. It was something I could do by myself. The only bad thing was I hate treadmills so it meant I would have to do it outside. Luckily, I am a night owl and I live on a military installation. It is easier for me to run at night because no one really sees me and I am in a safer environment.(I'm not saying there is no chance of something happening but the likelihood is low and I stay close to home.) Our post has free monthly 5K races that start each March. After my experience at the Princess in 2011, I decided to use these 5Ks to help me train. When I did that first 5k in March less than a month after being swept, I was nervous. I had no idea what to expect and I was afraid that I was going to be judged for being so slow. I was so incredibly wrong. The atmosphere there was so different than I expected. Yes, you had your speedy soldiers and teenagers that were in it to win it but they were greatly outnumbered. There were families with jogging strollers. Families with small kids on bikes. Families with dogs. Friends that just wanted to go out and walk it together. Every age, gender, shape and size. I was slow but I was not last and no one cared either way.
Slowly, as I began to train more, I started to feel more comfortable in what I was doing. Every now and then, someone would try to throw that off. Every now and then I would encounter the snotty girl at the gym that made snide comments while I ran the indoor track. Some days I would hear the drunk guys in the neighborhood on Saturday night playing beer pong and asking why the hell I was running so late on a weekend. I'd have to deal with the 16 year old idiot that laughed at me after I celebrated my fastest 5K. They were the people that in the past would have made me quit. Every time I dealt with one of these people, I would fall a little. I would go back into my shell and want to hide. I might take an extra day off or avoid the indoor track but eventually I would get back out there and start running again because I knew I was working towards something bigger.
It also helped that for those idiots that tried to bring me down, there were those that helped build me up. First of all, my husband has been AMAZING. He has been there for me every step of the way but some days the words of complete strangers can do so much more for you. In May, the post 5K is also a 10K. The 10K runners just do the course twice. I was running the 5K wearing a custom tech shirt that I had made that said "13.1 In Training" on the back. Half way through the 5K I was steadily being passed by 10K runners on their second lap. As I finished up mile two, a gentleman running the 10K paused as he passed me and said, "Just keep going. Keep trying and you'll get there. Don't give up." He was talking about my ambition to do a half marathon and I was very grateful. It was nice to know that I didn't have to be the ideal image of a runner for someone to think I could do it. Then there was the morning I was running laps with my husband around our neighborhood and someone stopped to tell me that they saw me running all the time and it really inspired them. Or the guy that, right after the 16 year old laughed at me, came up to me to congratulate me. He told me that when I crossed the finish line he wanted to run over and give me a hug but he thought it might creep me out so he just wanted to say he was proud of me. These people have been sprinkled throughout this journey to remind me that I am doing the right thing. I am doing something to better my life.
There was been an article that I have seen pop up on Facebook a few times recently that had I read it 3 years ago, I would have probably never taken another step or signed up for another race. It was written about 4 years ago and it is about how slow runners have no place in marathons(and half marathons) according to some. This mindset has drastically changed over the last few years as more and more people are choosing to run to improve their health. As I read the quotes sited in the article by other runners, I was fuming. It was heartbreaking and maddening to read some of the things they had to say. I wanted to cry and I wanted to scream all at the same time. It disgusted me how they could say such hurtful things about perfect strangers and put down their efforts to get healthy by running.
Reading that article was a good thing for me in some ways though. It made me realize how far I have come to overcome those fears that held me back for years. I do still care too much about what others think but I'm getting much, much better. When it comes to my running, I know that I am making huge strides. Today was a uge day for me because I ran my fastest mile at 10:52. I know to many, that is really slow but I think back to that May 5K when that stranger encouraged me and I realize that it was the first 5K I ever ran. That day I ran an 18 minute mile. Just over two years later I am averaging a 13:30 minute mile on my long runs and my fastest mile is under 11 minutes. I've come a LONG way and I have a lot to be proud of. Mac and I have been judged over decisions and life choices a lot in the last few years but I am finally accepting that people will always judge and that we have to continue to make the right decisions for us. The running community can be an awesome group of people and sometimes you come across those that can be a little harsh and take things a little too seriously. I know I will never win a race, but that's not going to stop me from running them.
I've come a long way in the last 3 years and learning to accept myself and my decisions as my own has been a huge part of my emotional journey to being a better me.
If you care to read the article, you can find it here.
For me, the later was my demon. Even though many may think that caring about what others think would drive you to get healthy, many times it is the complete opposite. When you worry so much about the opinions of others, you find yourself hiding out at home on the couch with a bag of chips, not hitting the gym and working out.
The first time I seriously tried to get control of my weight, Mac and I were living in El Paso. He had just commissioned into the Army and we were there for one of his training schools that lasted 5 months. We had been married for just over a year and we were living in a hotel on Fort Bliss. As part of living in the hotel, we had a pass to the indoor pool that just so happened to be across the street from the building we lived in. I decided that I was going to do weight watchers online and start going to the pool every day. Growing up, my grand parents had a pool I spent every hour I could in it. I have always loved swimming so I thought that would be the perfect thing to help me get back into shape.The first day that I walked over to the pool, I had no idea what I was in for. I walked in and there were soldiers in there working out. For some reason, it never dawned on me that there may be soldiers in there in the middle of the day. I changed into my suit and hopped in to the pool. I started swimming laps and after a few minutes, I had to get out. I started having a full blown panic attack. I was crying and hyperventilating which is a really bad thing to do in a pool. I got out of the pool, ran to the locker room, grabbed my stuff and left. I cried all the way back to our room. The reality is, no one said anything to me. No one gave me dirty looks. Nothing that anyone in the pool did triggered this reaction. I was so focused on what they MIGHT think and what I thought of myself that I was literally crippled by fear and shame. I never went back to the pool while we lived there. My efforts to get in shape and lose weight failed soon after and I gained more weight.
I have been living on an Army post for the last 5 1/2 years. There are numerous free gyms and free pools. I can probably count on two hands the number of times I have used a gym here. It's very intimidating to be in a gym with a bunch very fit soldiers. Especially when you have NO IDEA what you are doing. I have never been a gym person. I played sports. Just going to a gym and working out didn't make sense to me. I needed something to work towards and that is one of the reasons I got into running. But I didn't get into that until we had lived here for nearly 3 years. I tried in 2010, but I let my doubts get the best of me. That's what led to the 8 miles I did at Princess 2011. After being swept, I knew that I could do it if I tried. That confidence boost allowed me to settle into running and start down a path to a better life.
Running was easier. It was something I could do by myself. The only bad thing was I hate treadmills so it meant I would have to do it outside. Luckily, I am a night owl and I live on a military installation. It is easier for me to run at night because no one really sees me and I am in a safer environment.(I'm not saying there is no chance of something happening but the likelihood is low and I stay close to home.) Our post has free monthly 5K races that start each March. After my experience at the Princess in 2011, I decided to use these 5Ks to help me train. When I did that first 5k in March less than a month after being swept, I was nervous. I had no idea what to expect and I was afraid that I was going to be judged for being so slow. I was so incredibly wrong. The atmosphere there was so different than I expected. Yes, you had your speedy soldiers and teenagers that were in it to win it but they were greatly outnumbered. There were families with jogging strollers. Families with small kids on bikes. Families with dogs. Friends that just wanted to go out and walk it together. Every age, gender, shape and size. I was slow but I was not last and no one cared either way.
Slowly, as I began to train more, I started to feel more comfortable in what I was doing. Every now and then, someone would try to throw that off. Every now and then I would encounter the snotty girl at the gym that made snide comments while I ran the indoor track. Some days I would hear the drunk guys in the neighborhood on Saturday night playing beer pong and asking why the hell I was running so late on a weekend. I'd have to deal with the 16 year old idiot that laughed at me after I celebrated my fastest 5K. They were the people that in the past would have made me quit. Every time I dealt with one of these people, I would fall a little. I would go back into my shell and want to hide. I might take an extra day off or avoid the indoor track but eventually I would get back out there and start running again because I knew I was working towards something bigger.
It also helped that for those idiots that tried to bring me down, there were those that helped build me up. First of all, my husband has been AMAZING. He has been there for me every step of the way but some days the words of complete strangers can do so much more for you. In May, the post 5K is also a 10K. The 10K runners just do the course twice. I was running the 5K wearing a custom tech shirt that I had made that said "13.1 In Training" on the back. Half way through the 5K I was steadily being passed by 10K runners on their second lap. As I finished up mile two, a gentleman running the 10K paused as he passed me and said, "Just keep going. Keep trying and you'll get there. Don't give up." He was talking about my ambition to do a half marathon and I was very grateful. It was nice to know that I didn't have to be the ideal image of a runner for someone to think I could do it. Then there was the morning I was running laps with my husband around our neighborhood and someone stopped to tell me that they saw me running all the time and it really inspired them. Or the guy that, right after the 16 year old laughed at me, came up to me to congratulate me. He told me that when I crossed the finish line he wanted to run over and give me a hug but he thought it might creep me out so he just wanted to say he was proud of me. These people have been sprinkled throughout this journey to remind me that I am doing the right thing. I am doing something to better my life.
There was been an article that I have seen pop up on Facebook a few times recently that had I read it 3 years ago, I would have probably never taken another step or signed up for another race. It was written about 4 years ago and it is about how slow runners have no place in marathons(and half marathons) according to some. This mindset has drastically changed over the last few years as more and more people are choosing to run to improve their health. As I read the quotes sited in the article by other runners, I was fuming. It was heartbreaking and maddening to read some of the things they had to say. I wanted to cry and I wanted to scream all at the same time. It disgusted me how they could say such hurtful things about perfect strangers and put down their efforts to get healthy by running.
Reading that article was a good thing for me in some ways though. It made me realize how far I have come to overcome those fears that held me back for years. I do still care too much about what others think but I'm getting much, much better. When it comes to my running, I know that I am making huge strides. Today was a uge day for me because I ran my fastest mile at 10:52. I know to many, that is really slow but I think back to that May 5K when that stranger encouraged me and I realize that it was the first 5K I ever ran. That day I ran an 18 minute mile. Just over two years later I am averaging a 13:30 minute mile on my long runs and my fastest mile is under 11 minutes. I've come a LONG way and I have a lot to be proud of. Mac and I have been judged over decisions and life choices a lot in the last few years but I am finally accepting that people will always judge and that we have to continue to make the right decisions for us. The running community can be an awesome group of people and sometimes you come across those that can be a little harsh and take things a little too seriously. I know I will never win a race, but that's not going to stop me from running them.
I've come a long way in the last 3 years and learning to accept myself and my decisions as my own has been a huge part of my emotional journey to being a better me.
If you care to read the article, you can find it here.
Friday, August 9, 2013
Looking back on my Princess journey
I'm participating in a blog hop over at Kristy Runs Kato that is all about Princess Half Marathon recaps. As part of it, each blog links up with a direct link to their Princess race recap. I kept trying to decide which of my three recaps I wanted to use. I love my first recap from 2011 even though that race was nothing like I thought it would be. I was swept and felt very differently about it than I ever expected. I also wanted to link up to my 2012 recap about finally finishing the Princess. For me, 2013 was just a bad race day so that one wasn't really a contender but the first two are really special to me so I decided I would just make a new post and link back to both of those recaps.
Here you can read about my very first experience at the Princess Half Marathon. The post is entitled 8 miles and is about a lot more than just the race. It's about what led me to start the journey to change my life and how a little failure can be the push you need to start moving forward.
After my experience being swept, I decided I wanted to try again at the 2012 Princess Half Marathon. Eight months after my first Princess, my husband deployed for a year and I knew I would need something to keep me busy. I knew that if I signed up for the race again I would have to train and keep myself motivated while he was gone. In all of the craziness, I also signed up for the Inaugural Tinkerbell Half Marathon and had the goal of not only finishing one half marathon but two within a month and earning my Coast to Coast medal. A fellow army wife and close friend decided to run with me and a few friends from college joined us and we made a week long girls get away vacation out of it. We had an absolute blast and I finally accomplished the goal that I had set for myself a year and a half earlier.
I hope you enjoy both of these recaps and get a little something from them. I don't really talk much about character stops and all of that, but I do talk about what it feels like to run that course and find failure and success. I hope that any new readers who found me through the blog hop would stick around to see more of my journey. So many things have changed since that first Princess and even though I still have a long way to go, I know I am getting there one step at a time.
And if you really want to read about 2013's race, you can find it here.
Here you can read about my very first experience at the Princess Half Marathon. The post is entitled 8 miles and is about a lot more than just the race. It's about what led me to start the journey to change my life and how a little failure can be the push you need to start moving forward.
After my experience being swept, I decided I wanted to try again at the 2012 Princess Half Marathon. Eight months after my first Princess, my husband deployed for a year and I knew I would need something to keep me busy. I knew that if I signed up for the race again I would have to train and keep myself motivated while he was gone. In all of the craziness, I also signed up for the Inaugural Tinkerbell Half Marathon and had the goal of not only finishing one half marathon but two within a month and earning my Coast to Coast medal. A fellow army wife and close friend decided to run with me and a few friends from college joined us and we made a week long girls get away vacation out of it. We had an absolute blast and I finally accomplished the goal that I had set for myself a year and a half earlier.
I hope you enjoy both of these recaps and get a little something from them. I don't really talk much about character stops and all of that, but I do talk about what it feels like to run that course and find failure and success. I hope that any new readers who found me through the blog hop would stick around to see more of my journey. So many things have changed since that first Princess and even though I still have a long way to go, I know I am getting there one step at a time.
And if you really want to read about 2013's race, you can find it here.
This is pics from each of my three races. Things have really changed.
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Upcoming Races
So a few times I have talked about the busy running schedule I have coming up. I decided to put it out there so you can see what all I am running.
October 5th - Tower of Terror 10 miler - WDW
November 17th - Rock 'n' Roll Half Marathon - San Antonio
December 29th - Biggest Loser Half Marathon - Panama City Beach
January 18th - Tinkerbell 10K - DL
January 19th - Tinkerbell Half Marathon - DL
February 22nd - Enchanted 10K - WDW
February 23rd - Princess Half Marathon - WDW
These two races make up the Glass Slipper Challenge
My big goal is to have a great race at Princess finally. The other runs leading up to that I will take easier. If I'm feeling good at Tink, I will probably take advantage of the good climate and try for a good race. Training officially began this week. I'm using a different plan that I found on RunKeeper for my mileages each run but I am still using intervals. I think this plan will help better prepare me for the back to back races during Tink and Princess.
I know lots of other runners have much busier calendars but for me this is a big leap. I'm excited about experiencing a few new half marathons that are not done by RunDisney.
October 5th - Tower of Terror 10 miler - WDW
November 17th - Rock 'n' Roll Half Marathon - San Antonio
December 29th - Biggest Loser Half Marathon - Panama City Beach
January 18th - Tinkerbell 10K - DL
January 19th - Tinkerbell Half Marathon - DL
February 22nd - Enchanted 10K - WDW
February 23rd - Princess Half Marathon - WDW
These two races make up the Glass Slipper Challenge
My big goal is to have a great race at Princess finally. The other runs leading up to that I will take easier. If I'm feeling good at Tink, I will probably take advantage of the good climate and try for a good race. Training officially began this week. I'm using a different plan that I found on RunKeeper for my mileages each run but I am still using intervals. I think this plan will help better prepare me for the back to back races during Tink and Princess.
I know lots of other runners have much busier calendars but for me this is a big leap. I'm excited about experiencing a few new half marathons that are not done by RunDisney.
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